A Silly Crossover and Little More
by Tora-uma
Summary: Where do the bishounen and biseinin of so many anime series go after their stories end? Why, to a gigantic crossover of course! Note: Not every chapter has a character from every series listed, don't expect the same characters all the time.
1. Found! The Bishounen Cave 'O Wonder!

_I really didn't think that I could truly waste my time until I sat down to write this . . ._  
  
"A Silly Crossover and Little More"  
  
A pointless fic by Tora-uma  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the large number of characters, series or anything else that is casually mentioned in this story. Nor do I delude myself into thinking that I do which is damn impressive if you know me. Please don't sue, there's really no point as I have maybe 30 cents in my wallet right now and that's about it. Oh, and because I'm lazy and don't wanna type this at the beginning of each chapter, this applies to the entire fic.  
  
Warnings: Crossover, intense stupidity and silliness, slight OOC-ness, hentai jokes and situations, self-insertion, plotholes, duct tape, other things that I'm probably forgetting . . .  
  
A Quick Author Note: ". . ." – speaking  
  
"'. . ."' - inner thoughts  
  
{. . .}- telepathy  
  
Chapter One : Found! The Cave 'O Wonder!  
  
a.k.a. The Prologue Chapter  
  
Beeeeee......  
  
"Guhn. Huh?"  
  
......eeeeeeeeee.......  
  
"Oh, shut up."  
  
......eeeeeeeeee.......  
  
I finally gave up and smashed the alarm clock next to my head. It sputtered and finally died with an ill, whining noise. I rolled my eyes. It was time to buy a new alarm clock.  
  
Almost mostly awake, I let myself roll out of bed with a soft thud. I pushed the thick curtain of light brown hair from my face to enable me to see what the hell I was doing. As I looked at the large pile of random things that were thrown by my bed, however, I grimaced and decided the ability to see was greatly overrated. I really needed to clean. My room wasn't big enough for me to be a messy, unorganized person.  
  
Ignoring the giant pile of clothes and school things I knew I'd have to deal with eventually, I sat at my desk and logged on to my computer. I had enough time before my first class to check my email. My brow creased and I frowned as I saw who had sent the only message in my inbox.  
  
"Lindsey, why the hell did you email me? You live across the living room!" I shouted. When there was no answer I checked the calendar. Oops, she was still on vacation. I rolled my eyes, wondering what my roommate had sent me this time. Probably something I'd have to kick her for. I opened the message and promptly fell backwards out of my chair.  
  
There was one gigantic letter on the screen. One gigantic letter typed in shockingly bright, horrifying hot pink. I growled at the pink 'I' that was polluting my computer with its terrible color. Lindsey knew I hated all shades of the color pink, she _knew_ it.  
  
"You did it just to piss me off!" I screamed to the empty apartment, feeling slightly better after venting my frustrations. I glared back at the computer monitor again, this time noticing that there was more to the message. Growling under my breath I scrolled down, knowing Lindsey would beat me if I didn't read the entire thing.  
  
"I-F-O-U-N-D-I-T" I read aloud, one letter at a time. "I found it?" I mumbled. "Found what?" I looked at my wall calendar again. My pain-in-the-ass roommate had left for Japan for a vacation a little less than a week ago while I was stuck at home, taking summer classes. I tried to remember if she'd been looking for something specific there. Aside from a new boy-toy. My eyes grew wide and my mouth dropped as I realized what it was she must have found.  
  
"Squee!" a high-pitched excited noise escaped my lips as I pulled on a pair of jeans and a jacket and shoved my laptop and wallet into my backpack before darting out of the apartment and driving like a madwoman toward the airport.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

"Would you like something to drink?" the flight attendant took a closer look at me bouncing in my seat like a hyperactive puppy. "Err . . . something sugar-free perhaps?" She paled a bit. 

"No thanks! I'm fine!" I screeched. She nodded and quickly moved on down the aisle. I could feel my face cracking from the huge grin that refused to leave it. I had my laptop set up on the meal tray in front of me. An email telling Lindsey I was on my way and needed directions had been sent and I eagerly awaited a response. Finally I heard the telltale 'bling' of new mail arriving and before the little man had finished his 'You've got mail!' announcement I'd opened and was in the process of reading the message. It wasn't until I was halfway through the message that I realized it was an advertisement for mortgage rates and not the directions I'd been hoping for. I cursed. Loudly. And repeatedly.  
  
I was so caught up in my tirade of naughty words that I was completely oblivious to another bling signaling another message. By the time the flight attendants managed to wrestle me back into my seat the new mail was flashing angrily at me. This time I checked who had sent it and gave a yelp of delight when I saw it was Lindsey.  
  
"Head west out of Tokyo and go around the big mountain. Make sure you go around the big mountain, not the little one. I'm on the west slope, down in a small valley. See you soon!" it read. The directions weren't complicated which was good because, if they had been, I would have inevitably gotten lost. I just hoped that I would be able to tell the big mountain from the little one. I spent the rest of the flight in relative silence which was impressive considering I was so impatient for the plane to land that my head could have exploded at any minute. The moment I could, I dashed of the plane, belongings in tow. It wasn't until I was outside of the airport that I realized I had very little idea of which way was west and, once I got into the city, I would have even less of an idea. I don't do well with compass directions anyway but it's much worse when I'm surrounded by freakishly tall buildings. I scratched my head for a minute, not quite sure what to do. Finally I hailed a taxi, silently hoping that the miniscule amount of Japanese Lindsey had taught me would be enough to get by. I slipped inside the car and heard the driver ask me something that had to be the Japanese equivalent of 'Where to?'  
  
"Ano . . .isei . . . oh wait, no . . . uh . . . nishi? Is that it? Oh, shoot . . ."  
  
I heard a small chuckle from the front seat. "American?" the driver asked.  
  
I grinned sheepishly. "Yeah. You speak English?" (How terribly convenient, ne?)  
  
"Some, for tourists," he told me. "Where are you going?"  
  
"Uh, west, out of the city. Towards the mountains."  
  
He gave me an odd look in the rearview mirror before shrugging and heading off. I suddenly felt the urge to explain my destination.  
  
"I'm meeting a friend, we're going . . . camping in the mountains," I lied. Mentally I smacked myself, thinking I probably could not have come up with a worse story.  
  
"No luggage?" the driver asked.  
  
I paled, completely forgetting there were logistics involved in camping. "I, uh . . . my friend has my stuff," I finished lamely, thinking there was no way this guy was gonna believe me. But he just nodded and concentrated on driving through the Tokyo traffic. I settled back, chatting politely with the driver until the city slowly melted away. As the last of the buildings disappeared I began searching ahead for the mountain I was supposed to be going to. It didn't take me long to find it.  
  
"Ooh! There, that's where I'm supposed to go!" I cried and pointed, nearly smacking my driver in the face. "Ooo, sorry."  
  
"Big one or little one?" he asked.  
  
"Big one." I clearly remembered Lindsey's adamant email about going to the big mountain rather than the small one. We continued on, eventually coming to a stop at a small temple near the base of the mountain.  
  
"Your friend will most likely meet you here, it's the only temple on the mountain," the driver told me as I climbed out of the taxi. "Fare is 9,254 yen." I paled a bit and tried to convert the figure into dollars in my head as I handed over my credit card and let him swipe it.  
  
"Have a nice trip!" the driver called as he began to pull away.  
  
"Arigatoh!" I waved goodbye, hoping I hadn't mangled the pronunciation too badly. Once the little taxi disappeared I slung the backpack with my laptop in it over my shoulder and began the hike to the back of the big mountain. About five miles into the hike, I realized why Lindsey had called it the big mountain. As the day dragged on and the temperature quickly rose I began to think that the damn mountain didn't have a back at all but instead had a side that continued on forever and the entire situation was just another of Lindsey's practical jokes that only she found funny. As the sun began to set and my feet began to drag as though they wanted to fall off I thought about crawling under a tree somewhere to die. Or maybe just to sleep for the night, whichever happened first. Just as I was about to let myself fall under a bush I caught a sudden glimpse of light to my right on the mountain.  
  
Curiosity banished my fatigue and I continued down the small hill ahead of me and headed closer toward the mountain. After a moment I realized that the hill was actually the side of a small valley and hurried closer to where I saw the flash of light. I pushed leaves and branches out of my way until I finally stumbled into a small clearing at the bottom of the valley. In the side of the mountain was a large cave with a giant, dull metal door completely covering the opening. Realizing that this had to be my destination I began banging on the door. After a moment an eye slot slid open and two piercing blue eyes peered down at me. I was suddenly reminded of every gangster movie I'd ever seen and briefly wondered if there was perhaps an illegal gambling parlor or maybe a meeting of mob bosses behind the door. I heard muffled voices and some grumbling behind the door before the eye slot closed sharply and whoever was on the other side began to unlock and open it. The moment it was physically possible for me to squeeze through the opening I did it. I heard a small sigh from whoever belonged to the bright blue eyes that had let me in as the heavy door began to close again. As I stood in the mouth of the cave, waiting for my eyes to adjust to the dark I suddenly heard the tell-tale pitter-patter of feet as well as an odd, dragging sound just before I was glomped.  
  
"Lynz . . . get off . . . crushing . . . windpipe . . ." I managed to gasp out despite the fact that my roommate's arms were wrapped rather tightly around my neck.  
  
"Oops! Sorry, Megan." She laughed softly and stood up, leaving me room to collect myself. My eyes finally adjusted to the dimmer light in the cave and I got up to find myself staring at Lindsey. Or, more specifically, staring at the redhead she was standing next to.  
  
"A . . . Aya?" I managed to choke out. He grunted quietly. That's when I noticed Lindsey had handcuffed him . . . to herself. Almost on cue the two of us began to bounce up and down and giggle maniacally.  
  
"Geeze, and I thought one of you was bad enough. Hey, cut it out, would you?" The blue-eyed doorman snuck around behind me and smacked Lindsey in the head.  
  
"Oww! Kouga-kun!" she sulked and pouted, rubbing her head as I watched Aya give Kouga an almost appreciative look. Apparently having his arm jerked up and down while the brunette he was chained to bounced next to him wasn't his favorite pastime. I laughed in my own head and started peering around.  
  
"Hey, Lynz, you gonna show me around? Lynz?" I stopped looking at the incredibly high ceiling and turned back to her. And watched her as she stared at Kouga's ass as he slowly retreated back into the cave.  
  
"Huh?" She turned back to me with a dazed look on her face. I smacked my forehead in exasperation and I'm pretty sure Aya smirked. Slightly. I dunno, maybe not. "Oh!" she cried, seeming to remember what was going on. "A tour, right, ok, yeah, let's go!" she announced, pumping one fist in the air, turning on her heel and skipping further into the cave, dragging the grumbling redhead behind her. I obediently followed behind them, probably looking more like a dog than I wished to.  
  
The mouth of the cave immediately opened up into a larger, better lit chamber. The size and lighting of the room were not what I was interested in, however.  
  
"Hiei!" I squealed, I admit it. But that's not the embarrassing part. I dove. Right at him. And sadly, he dodged. Quite easily, actually, and I went flying headfirst into the side of the cave.  
  
"Hn," was all he said before putting a foot on my back as though I was a hunting trophy. A chorus of laughs answered him and I wondered just how many people were in this damn cave. When Hiei finally flitted away, allowing me to pick myself up, I balked at the answer to my question.  
  
"Oh . . . my . . . bishounen . . ." I whispered. The entire cave was milling with them, most of them looking straight at me and trying to control their amusement at my failed glomping attempt. I heard Lindsey snicker. I ignored her. "How the hell did you find this place?" I asked quietly, trying not to draw more attention to myself. There were enough pretty men looking at me and snickering behind their hands.  
  
"Pure dumb luck, honey," she told me. This time I know Aya smirked. And snickered even. Lindsey's eyes narrowed and I swear she mumbled something at him that sounded like 'duct tape'. Whatever she said, it got him to shut his mouth pretty quickly. Obviously there was more to this story but I didn't really care how my roommate had found this place. The important thing was that she found it. "C'mon, get up," Lindsey offered me the hand that wasn't currently connected to Aya and helped haul me to my feet. "So, on with the tour! These are the guys, obviously, and here's the TV-slash-computer area . . ." she motioned to a rather large TV screen surrounded by couches, chairs and all sorts of electronic equipment as she began walking around the cave, pulling her hesitant boy-toy along with her. I followed willingly, trying to hide my face from the men still laughing at me. There wasn't much of a point as Lindsey and I were the only females present. Didn't stop me from trying though.  
  
"And here's the bathroom . . ." Lindsey continued, either unaware or not caring that I was trying to hide behind her. "And all the other rooms are bedrooms!"  
  
I stared at her incredulously for a moment before counting the other doors. "Do you really need this many bedrooms?" I asked, deciding to stop counting after thirty-something.  
  
"Yes. Yes we do," she nodded sagely. "Actually, each of the guys has their own and there are a few extras, just in case."  
  
"Fair enough. But how can you tell who's room is who's?" They all looked identical to me.  
  
"Oh, trust me, just open doors and you'll learn pretty quickly." She grinned widely. "This is your room," she told me as she threw open the door she was standing next to.  
  
It really wasn't so bad. Of course, the only thing I really paid attention to was the gigantic round bed in the middle of the room. The damn thing could fit six grown men comfortably. "Ummm . . . did you do this? The bed, I mean?"  
  
"No, actually, it was like this when I got here. I still haven't figured out how they fit the mattress through the doorframe . . ." she trailed off as she measured the frame and the bed with her eyes, trying to figure out how it was physically possible to squeeze such a large object through an opening a quarter of its size. I'd told her she needed to stop reading physics books for fun but she never did listen. Her brow creased in annoyance and she turned back to me, probably deciding to come back to the problem later, when she had a text book and extra paper in hand.  
  
"Why such a big bed?" I asked curiously. "A normal sized bed wouldn't do?"  
  
"If you'd like, I can demonstrate just how essential a large bed is." A tall, slender man with long, fuchsia hair slid an arm around my shoulders.  
  
"Uh, Gojyo, hang on a second . . ." I stuttered. I felt a second arm wrap around my waist.  
  
"Demonstrations are very important, after all. And it would be our pleasure to show such a lovely young woman the major features of a bed such as this," the arm on my waist began steering me into the bedroom.  
  
"Yohji, wait, just . . . hey!" Gojyo and Yohji worked together and rather effortlessly guided me into the room. Of course, I wasn't really resisting much either.  
  
"Lindsey?" I turned my head back in a half-hearted, last-ditch effort to escape.  
  
"Have fun!" she grinned widely and gave me a thumbs up as Gojyo closed the door with his foot.

* * *

"Kenshin, why isn't she here yet?" Lindsey pouted and finished tying off the braid she'd weaved the swordsman's long hair into. Not as easy as one might think if one's hand is handcuffed to someone else. Someone who has no desire to participate in the braiding process. "Aya, stop sulking. Just because I managed to chase you down and restrain you doesn't give you the right to be more of an ass than usual." To accentuate her point she pinched his ass. Hard.  
  
"Why isn't she hurrying Kenshin? I'm bored." She continued to pout.  
  
"Don't worry. I'm sure she'll be here soon, that I am." He turned to face her with a smile.  
  
"Mm-kay, if you're sure," she pulled her legs closer to her and propped her chin on one hand. Kenshin tapped her nose before wandering off, leaving her to curl up next to Aya. "How come she's taking so long?" Lindsey asked quietly.  
  
"Stop being so impatient," came the stoic answer.  
  
"No."  
  
"Then maybe you should have given better directions," he suggested.  
  
Stop trying to help because you're not and if you keep this up, I'm bringing out the duct tape again!" she narrowed her eyes in challenge. Aya sweat dropped slightly and decided to keep his mouth shut for the rest of the night. At that exact moment (See, this is where I got bored of writing filler story), a loud banding noise was heard.  
  
"Megan!" came the squeal from Lindsey as she drug Aya to his feet and bolted towards the door.  
  
Kouga was peering through the eye slot when the two came running up.  
  
"Kouga, let her in!" Lindsey told him.  
  
"Are you sure? She looks a little crazed . . ." (Yeah, she gets that look sometimes. Kinda funny, actually.)  
  
"Please, Kouga-kun?" she clasped her hands together and her eyes became watery orbs.  
  
"Alright, alright, I'll let her in, stop making that face," Kouga turned back and opened the door. The moment Megan squeezed through, Lindsey ran at her, dragging a still silent redheaded assassin behind her. Kouga watched as the new girl was glomped by the resident psycho female. He also watched the look of irritation on Aya's face as he was pulled around like a plushie. "'Well,"' Kouga thought, "'It's his own fault for underestimating her with handcuffs."'  
  
"Geeze, and I thought one of you was bad enough. Hey, cut it out, would you?" he smacked Lindsey in the back of the head to get her to stop bouncing. As much as he was enjoying the show, there were other things to be done.  
  
As he walked away, Lindsey was momentarily mesmerized. "'Hmm . . . maybe I should let Aya go for a few hours . . ."'  
  
". . . Lynz?"  
  
"Huh?" she reluctantly turned back to her newly arrived roommate. "Oh! A tour, right, ok, yeah, let's go!" She skipped ahead into the cave, knowing Megan would follow. As she went around the corner and into the main room of the cave she briefly wondered how her friend would react to the scene before her. She didn't wait long for an answer.  
  
"Hiei!" the screech reverberated throughout the cave and Lindsey turned just in time to see her friend dive headfirst into the rock wall. Everyone winced slightly at the resounding crack but, when it became apparent that Megan was very much still alive and twisting under Hiei's foot, trying to get a hand on him, the wincing quickly turned to snickering and then to laughter. When Hiei finally decided to let his attacker up, Lindsey decided to play the role of a good friend and went to help pull Megan to her feet.  
  
"Oh . . . my . . . bishounen . . ." she heard Megan whisper the moment she got a good look at the room. Lindsey snickered loudly and the response and glanced around the cave at everyone else's reactions. "How the hell did you find this place?" Megan asked.  
  
"Pure dumb luck, honey." Lindsey heard Aya snicker behind her when her answer reached his ears. "Duct tape . . ." she mumbled under her breath. He was immediately silent. "C'mon, get up," Lindsey held her hand out to the girl still crouched on the floor. When Megan was once again on her feet, the tour began. Megan followed closely behind, listening as her friend described every part of her new home.  
  
As the two discussed the absolute necessity of having a myriad of bedrooms Lindsey watched out of the corner of her eye as Gojyo and Yohji slunk up behind Megan. Her face remained perfectly even and serious but inside she was laughing her ass off. She was amazed at her own ability to quell her hysterical laughter until after Gojyo kicked the door closed.  
  
"You really do have a sick sense of humor," Hiei appeared next to her while she was doubled over, giggling.  
  
"Oh hush," she mock-scowled at the fire demon when she got her breath back. "So do you. At least I didn't make her run headfirst into a rock wall."  
  
"Hn," was his only response before wandering off.  
  
"Do you think your friend would do me the honor of bearing my child?"  
  
"Dunno Miroku," Lindsey told him as she deftly removed his hand from her backside. "Guess you'll have to ask her yourself. When she comes out!" she cried, pulling on his monk's robes to keep him from entering the occupied bedroom.  
  
"Cripes you're a lech," she told him, shaking her head and letting him go.  
  
"Ne, I'm hungry. Is it time to eat yet?" Son Goku scratched behind his ear.  
  
"When is it not time to eat with you?" Lindsey cocked an eyebrow.  
  
"Well that's true," his stomach growled loudly. "Please? I need food . . ."  
  
"You just ate before Megan got here. But yeah, ok," she tried unsuccessfully to blow her dark brown bangs out of her face. "Let's get you some food . . . again . . ."  
  
An hour or so later  
  
"Lindsey . . ."  
  
"Get your own damn popcorn Goku."  
  
"Oh . . . ok."  
  
Several more hours later  
  
"Are they ever coming out?" Goku thrust his thumb behind him at the still-closed bedroom door.  
  
"Theoretically I think they kinda have to," Lindsey told him.  
  
"Should we check on them?"  
  
She lifted her head from where it was resting on Aya's chest. "Do you want to subject your eyes to whatever is behind that door?"  
  
"Not really," Goku shook his head.  
  
"Then I guess we aren't going to check on them," she stated as she re-curled herself next to Aya on the couch and continued channel surfing. "Why the hell isn't anything on at three in the morning? I'm an insomniac, not in dire need of a damn rotisserie for my kitchen," she mumbled as she continued past yet another infomercial. At the sound of a door softly opening she lifted her head again, looking past where Goku was balled in an armchair with a bucket of ice cream.  
  
"Hey chica, still alive?" she asked as Megan finally stumbled out of the bedroom.  
  
"Huh?" Megan looked up with a stunned expression.  
  
"Your shirt's on backwards."  
  
"Wha . . . what shirt?" she scratched her head, confused. Lindsey chuckled and shook her head.  
  
"Go to bed, I think you need some sleep."  
  
"He he . . . I stole Yohji's scrunchy," Megan grinned triumphantly as she held up the small hair band.  
  
"That's lovely, congratulations. Now go to bed." This time the order was obeyed as the new arrival shuffled back into the room and quietly shut the door.  
  
"Damn infomercials," Lindsey cursed under her breath as she continued to flip through the television channels.  
  
"How long do you plan on doing this?" Aya mumbled quietly.  
  
"Until I find something worth watching."  
  
"Guess I'm sleeping here then," he said as he closed his eyes.  
  
"I'll let you go to bed if you want, I don't mind."  
  
Aya shook his head slightly. "Comfortable."  
  
"Mm-kay. Don't eat all the ice cream, Goku," Lindsey shifted her attention to the boy briefly.  
  
"But I'm hungry . . ."  
  
"Well, just don't eat all of it. I'm sure somebody else may want some later. Like me."  
  
"Ok. You're really gonna stay up until something comes on?"  
  
"Hell yes. I will not be defeated by an infomercial!" she declared as Goku shrugged and returned to the ice cream bucket. 


	2. Things Always Look Different in the Morn...

"A Silly Crossover and Little More"

A pointless fic by Tora-uma

A Quick Author Note:

". . ." – speaking

"'. . . "'- inner thoughts

-. . .- - telepathy

Okay, so this chapter took a little longer getting up than I thought it would. Sorry. Hopefully the next one will be up sooner. Anyway, thanks to Miko no Tears and Aya and to wannabeinanime for their reviews of the first chapter.

Chapter Two : Things Always Look Different in the Morning

When I awoke the next morning I found Gojyo's arm slowly crushing my windpipe. I pushed it off and rolled over to find my face was now crushed against Yohji's chest. They had me pinned in.

"Bed's so damn big it could sleep a freaking elephant and they're pushed up against me like we're trapped in a closet," I mumbled. Deciding I really had no more use for sleep I cautiously sat up and crawled forward between the two men. I tied my long hair up in the scrunchy I'd stolen from Yohji the night before, pulled on my jeans and T-shirt and quietly opened the bedroom door.

"Stop right there!" I froze at the sound of Gojyo's voice behind me. Slowly I turned my head and saw that neither of them had moved.

"I'll never allow you to harm such a beautiful woman," Gojyo muttered. Sleep-talking. And I can't say I was at all surprised by the content of his dreams. Shaking my head I left the room.

As I closed the door softly I stared at the TV for a moment, confused. It seemed to be flipping through channels on its own. I peeked over the edge of the couch and saw a half asleep Aya barely focusing on the television screen. Lindsey's head rested on his chest and she lazily pushed buttons on the remote control.

"Lynz? When did you get up?" I asked surprised. She rarely got up before mid-day if she didn't have to and yet here she was, less than an hour after dawn, seemingly awake.

"Didn't go to bed," she answered. I watched as the channels flew by. After a moment Lindsey paused and went back a few channels, finally settling on one.

"Ha!" She cried and sat up suddenly. "I win! Take that, rotisserie infomercial!"

"Ok then . . ." I saw the slightly crazed look in her bloodshot eyes and backed away as she settled down to watch the cartoon she'd finally decided on. I slowly edged away toward the kitchen that had been pointed out to me the day before. As I pushed the door open I heard a strange rustling noise.

"Hello?"

At the sound of my voice, Goku lifted his head above the refrigerator door. "Oh, good morning," he told me before turning back to his rummaging.

"Uh, Goku, what are you doing?"

"My stomach woke me up." I could hear the pout in his voice. I leaned against the refrigerator door with my shoulder, peering down at him. "Anything good in there?" I asked. He shook his head, causing his brown hair to sway above his gold coronet. I reached over him to grab a can of soda and sat on the counter behind him.

"So is Lindsey still up?" he asked. I nodded before I realized he couldn't see me. "Uh-huh," I grunted.

"How come she's so crazy sometimes?"

Have you ever had soda spray out of your nose? It really hurts! Falling off the counter to the floor from laughing didn't help much in the pain department either.

"Wonderful, another one." I could feel the sneer that had been aimed at me. I stopped laughing long enough to bend my head back from where it rested on the kitchen floor, realizing I hadn't even heard the door open.

"Ooo! A Vejiita!" I squealed, surprising myself at my ability to launch my body in the air and at the short, muscular man behind me. I was stopped short, however, by his hand gripping my head. "Owww!"

"Exactly how many of you am I going to have to put up with?" he growled. I shrugged as best as I could while being held in midair by my head.

"Tousan, let her down." Vejiita frowned and grumbled slightly but eventually dropped me on the ground. I picked myself up, relatively unfazed by my treatment. I had to learn to stop flying at the men running around.

"Ooo, a Trunks too!" I grinned but refrained from jumping him, a sign that I was slowly learning.

"Nice to meet you," Trunks smiled and bowed his head. "Megan, right?"

"Yeah! How did you know?"

"Well, uh . . ." he blushed slightly. "It was hard to miss your entrance yesterday."

I felt my face burn, remembering the encounter between my head and the wall the previous day. I felt myself shrink under Trunks' smiling eyes, knowing he found it amusing but was too polite to comment. Vejiita had no such reservations.

"Yes, human, you seem to make quite the fool of yourself," he snorted before pushing Goku out of his way and burying his own had in the fridge.

"Tousan," I saw Trunks cringe and glance towards me, hoping I wasn't offended. Goku meanwhile had latched on to Vejiita's back and was still pulling food out over the Saiyan's shoulder. I smiled at Trunks to try and show him that I'd taken no offence at his father's comment as the Saiyan prince tried to pull the smaller boy off his back.

"So why are you up so early? Everyone else still seems to be asleep."

"Didn't really feel like sleeping," I shrugged, trying to avoid openly staring at the struggle between Vejiita and Goku over the refrigerator. "Why are you up?" I asked the half-Saiyan.

"Training. Tousan and I are always up early to get a few hours of work in before everyone else starts milling around," Trunks explained.

"Oh, that makes sense," I nodded eagerly and backed against the counter. In this position I could focus on Trunks while keeping an eye on the small battle happening to my left so that, if something came flying in my direction, I would have the chance to duck. "So why are y'all here?" I had to ask. Not that I was complaining, I was just nosey.

"Well, we all kept getting chased down. Fangirls are a dangerous and horrifying thing . . . especially mobs of them." He failed to repress a shudder. "So we thought we would be relatively free from all the attention if we packed ourselves away in the middle of the mountains."

I nodded in agreement before I thought of something. "Wait though, Lindsey and I found this place so what's stopping anyone else from finding it?" I saw Goku throw a frying pan at Vejiita out of the corner of my eye.

"Well, you're only here because she told you how to get here," he pointed behind him with his thumb, presumably to where Lindsey was still on the couch, gloating over her victory with the TV. "And the only reason she found us was because . . ."

A sudden shout from his father interrupted Trunks as Son Goku went flying through the kitchen wall.

"Damn it!" I heard Lindsey scream from the other room. "Veggie Burger, you'd better stop that _right_ now!"

"Ve . . . Veggie Burger? She calls you Veggie Burger?" I stuttered. Vejiita glowered in response and crossed his arms, obviously not pleased with his nickname. "And why haven't you killed her yet?" I asked, stunned. Trunks opened his mouth as if to respond.

"Not a word, Trunks," Vejiita growled before stalking out of the kitchen, son following behind. Apparently he didn't want people to know the origin of his nickname either.

"You're fixing that wall," I heard Lindsey tell him as Goku strolled back into the kitchen, this time using the door.

"Are . . . are you okay?" I asked him, slightly shocked that he didn't look at all damaged.

"Oh, yeah, I'm fine," he shrugged before grabbing half a watermelon and returning to the TV area. I shook my head, grabbed another soda and followed.

Outside the kitchen I noticed that quite a few people were up and milling about. None of them were paying attention to the Goku-shaped hole in the wall however. A-day-in-the-life-of I guess, I dunno.

"How's your show?" I asked Lindsey as I leaned over the back of the couch.

"Crappy. But at least it's not an infomercial," she responded. "Ooh, caffeine!" she spotted the unopened can in my hand and snatched it away.

"Hey!" I cried as she opened and drained half the can in one swift movement. "Please, by all means, steal my breakfast. Bitch," I mumbled as I smacked her hard in the arm.

"Oww . . ." she whimpered, rubbing the now injured area.

"Did you think you could get away?" I felt two arms wrap around my waist and haul me backwards.

"Gojyo, you can't just grab me whenever the hell you want to!" I half shrieked.

"You don't really seem to be fighting it," he whispered. It was true, I wasn't. But damn him for noticing!

"Gojyo-san, you must learn that such a lovely woman should not be kept to yourself," Miroku slid up and grasped both of my hands. "Would you please bear my child?"

"Uh . . ." I whimpered slightly. "Look, no offence, but I really don't want kids. Not that I wouldn't have your kids! If I wanted them, I mean, but I really don't think I do so I don't think I should have anybody's children, even yours, though you'd be at the top of my list of fathers if I ever decided I wanted them!"

"Not bad!" Lindsey poked her head over the back of the couch. "Exactly 2.64 seconds for that entire speech. Though I think a simple 'no' would have sufficed."

I wasn't so sure. Even after my hurried statement, Miroku wasn't going away. In fact, his grip tightened slightly and he began to inch closer. I eeped slightly and backed up a step, forgetting that Gojyo was still behind me. Just as I got the distinct impression that I was about to be pounced on, Lindsey decided to give me some breathing room.

"Miroku?" she began sweetly and smiled. "Will you get me some muffins for breakfast?"

He balked slightly as if deciding what to do before bowing. "Of course," he nodded before heading off to the kitchen.

"And Gojyo? Will you bring some milk?" she smiled again. Way too sweetly. Especially for Lindsey.

"Why didn't you have him get it?"

"Because I want you to get it." A tiny evil gleam entered her eyes as she watched to see what he would do.

"Alright," he sighed softly and wandered off after Miroku.

"Sit. Now," Lindsey told me while pointing at an empty chair. I quickly obeyed before anyone else had a chance to grab me.

"What the hell are you watching?" I asked as I slid into the chair.

"Game show. Just something to kill time before the kids get up."

"Kids?" I watched in fascination as Aya sat up and scrunched against one arm of the couch, pulling Lindsey with him. It was an odd position and the way they were huddled up I couldn't tell who was protecting whom. That became evident when a multicolored ball slammed into my roommate.

"Remote, remote!" it demanded, pulling the small plastic rectangle out of Lindsey's hand.

"Damn it Rinku, are you hiding sugar in your room again? You're such a pain in the ass when you're this hyped up," she growled as she wrestled Rinku onto the seat cushion next to her with her one free hand. Aya glowered slightly as the commotion subsided and the short brunette child settled down and flipped directly to a certain channel.

"I'm searching your room for that candy, Rinku, I've warned you not to hide it," Lindsey mumbled.

"I ate it all," Rinku replied. I watched Lindsey's eyes narrow at the small demon boy sitting next to her. I couldn't be certain if she was angry because the kid was on a sugar high or if it was because he'd eaten all the candy and left none for her. Probably the latter, seeing as Rinku was quickly calming down.

"Wait a second," I started as a realization hit me, "didn't you say _kids_? As in more than one?"

Lindsey nodded solemnly. Then I heard the footsteps.

"Shippou, get off my head!" I hard a muffled screech as a vibrating ball of fur latched on to Lindsey's face. She finally managed to pull him off and set him down as everyone else wandered in.

"Ohayou gozaimasu!" Omi grinned as he bounced over to the couch. Then he caught sight of me. "Oh! Hajimemashite," he said, bowing in my direction.

"Um, hi," I replied meekly, sinking into myself in embarrassment. I don't do well when people say things I don't understand. Omi blinked once in mild confusion before smiling brightly. "I'm Omi, welcome to our home," he tried again.

"I'm Megan, nice to meet you," I inclined my head slightly, not sure if I should stand to introduce myself or not. Satisfied that polite pleasantries had been exchanged at least on his part, Omi settled on the floor with one of the four laptops scattered around the area. I turned back to Lindsey to see a writhing mass of limbs in her place.

"Get off!" I heard the muffled yell underneath the blanket of children. None of them moved. In fact, they all started giggling. "Get off me right now or you're going to have to answer to Aya!" That got them settled down relatively quickly.

"Aw, how cute, you have an entire herd of children to care for," I grinned, not willing to miss the opportunity to tease Lindsey about something like this, even if it did mean putting my own life on the line. She glared.

"Yeah, well, with any luck in a few days they'll be using you as a jungle gym instead of me."

"That's not funny!" I cried as she smirked.

"Oh, lovely, they're up," Gojyo sighed as he carried a carton of milk towards Lindsey.

"You know," she started as he handed it to her, "when a person asks for some milk, it's customary to pour it into a glass."

He shrugged and moved aside for the monk coming up behind him. "Yay, muffins! Thank you, Miroku!" Lindsey squealed and gratefully took the plate. Unfortunately, it seemed everyone else shared her excitement over the food.

"Hey, what the . . . stop it! . . . No, wait . . . HANDS OFF MY MUFFINS!"

Shippou, Rinku, Chiriko, Rin, Mokuba, Yahiko and Omi all held a muffin. Even Nagi had floated one off the plate and was holding it protectively. Lindsey glared at all of them at once, something I was rather impressed by. It did not have the desired effect, however, as everyone shoved the muffins in their mouths at the exact same time. A strangled, horrified noise escaped Lindsey's throat as she and Aya were left with nary a crumb.

"Fine," she recovered her composure and sat up straight. "But you don't get any milk," she clutched the carton to her. It was really all I could do to keep from laughing.

"Aww, what's the matter, did they steal your muffins again?" Long fingers wove themselves through Lindsey's dark brown hair.

"Bite me Schuldig."

"Maybe later," he grinned, continuing to toy with her hair. It wasn't until after I jumped that I realized I'd been preparing to pounce on the man. Can anyone guess what happened next? That's right, Megan became reacquainted with the floor . . . again. I stared at the white shoes that were level with my face and heard a low chuckle. "Charming," he sneered before leaving, blurring into a streak of orange.

I already felt compelled to chase after him. Even though I knew running would be involved. I told myself that this was _Schuldig_ and that he was well worth running after. So I did.

"Is that a good idea? Letting her chase after him like that?" Aya asked.

"Meh." Lindsey shrugged. "If you'll excuse me, I'm going to get food that won't be stolen by this group of brats," she scowled and went to stand up before realizing something was barring her way. "Oh yeah, handcuffs," she mumbled. Aya made it quite clear he wasn't moving. "Oh fine," she stuck her tongue out at him and pulled the key out of her pocket, releasing both their wrists from the cuffs and letting them fall to the couch. "Stay there you lazy bastard, see if I care," she muttered under her breath as she and her carton of milk headed back towards the kitchen.

Gojyo and Miroku had wandered off somewhere and Vejiita had yet to start fixing the Goku-hole in the wall. Goku himself had fallen asleep in front of the open refrigerator with a chicken bone hanging out of his mouth. Lindsey sighed, pulled the bone out to keep the kid from choking and closed the refrigerator door while looking around for something else to eat.

"Ooh, cake!" she grinned. "That's even better than muffins!" She was interrupted in the cake-cutting process, however, by two sudden voices from the doorway.

"That's really not the healthiest meal, no da," the first voice said.

"Hey, cake!" cried the second.

Tasuki lept at the cake as Chichiri stayed in the doorway and sweatdropped.

"It's ok, Chichiri," she said as she sat on the counter and motioned him over. "One piece of cake won't hurt anything."

"That's not a piece," he said, leaning next to her, "That's a quarter of the cake, no da."

"And here's another one!" cried Tasuki, devouring the rather large piece of cake on his plate in two bites. Lindsey held out the milk carton to him. Shaking his head and making a face he pushed Goku out of the way with his foot and grabbed something alcoholic from the refrigerator.

"Right, you won't drink milk but it's never too early for alcohol," she mumbled under her breath. Chichiri sat on the counter next to her and stole a bite of cake.

"Well don't you all look happy and cozy," Vejiita half-sneered as he leaned a large slab of rock against the kitchen wall.

"Oh stop it; you're just mad because I'm making you fix the wall. But it was your own damn fault," Lindsey pointed out matter-of-factly. Vejiita just scowled again. Ignoring it, she passed the carton of milk and the last few bites of cake to Chichiri and hopped to the floor.

"Well, I'm gonna go take a nap," she declared, heading towards the door. "Do a good job, Veggie Burger," she patted him on the rear as she passed, just to irritate him further. She walked to the couch to collect Aya only to find that the man had disappeared under a swarm of children.

"Okay leeches, time to get off," she called out, squeezing her arm between wriggling bodies to grasp Aya's wrist and haul him out. At the sudden shifting of the support under them, children began flying off in all directions. Except Yahiko, who didn't get off in time and went sprawling on the floor as Aya stood.

"Hey, that hurt!" he cried.

"Too bad," Lindsey giggled, leaning over the couch to tousle his spikey hair. "Next time move faster." She winked at him and stood up, walking away from the conglomeration of children. Aya went silently; glad he would finally be able to spend time away from the noise.

"Oh, crap, I forgot, you haven't eaten anything yet!" Lindsey stopped mid-stride and turned back to the kitchen.

"Don't need anything," Aya told her, grabbing her wrist to keep her from going far. "Need sleep. Now."

"Hey, the King of sentence fragments speaks!" she raised her eyebrows in astonishment. When she saw the look on his face, however, she decided to drop the joke. "Okay, sleep first, I agree." Before she'd finished nodding, Aya began to haul her towards the peace and quiet of the bedroom.


	3. In Which Several Different Characters ar...

"A Silly Crossover and Little More"

A pointless fic by Tora-uma

A Quick Author Note: ". . ." - speaking

"'. . ."' - inner thoughts

-. . .- - telepathy

Alright, first the thanks: dunken2, samuraiduck27 and UnicornGirl-DragonLady, thank you for the reviews of the last chapter. Next, the Q&A: Yes, Tasuki is the redhead with the fan in Fushigi Yuugi and no, I haven't even come close to introducing all the characters yet. Now, the explanation that I forgot to put in both of the other chapters: the part of the story that is in first person is not from my point of view, it's from my roommate's. This story is a dream of hers that was based on a theory of mine so she's Megan, I'm Lindsey (the crazy one with the handcuffs). Finally: I hope everyone has been enjoying this, I can tell you that it's been interesting to write and I'm curious myself as to how it will all end. Of course, that won't be for awhile, so I hope you've strapped yourselves in for the long haul.

Chapter Three : In Which Several Different Characters are Beaten

"Wh...Wait!" I gasped out desperately. The orange streak that was Schuldig continued on, however. I'd been chasing after him for the good part of a half an hour with absolutely no success. "Damn you for being pretty and German!" I shouted. At that precise moment, a black streak darted in front of me, succeeding in gaining my attention. Wondering who that could be, I began chasing after it rather than Schuldig. After a few minutes, I managed to corner it.

"Hiei!" I giggled when the blurring stopped and the figure became clear. With all my attention focused on the fire demon before me, I prepared to pounce. "Geep!" The orange streak darted in front of me and distracted me long enough for Hiei to escape. "Damn!" I growled, refocusing my attention to the orange streak and chasing it. After another short jaunt I managed to pin Schuldig in a corner as well. Unfortunately, the black streak that I now knew was Hiei distracted me and my prey escaped again. It was about this time that I realized they were probably working together to bait and hook me. I also realized that I didn't care. So I continued to chase after both of them, leaving one for the other every time someone darted across my path. After a few laps around the rather large cave I became distracted by something else.

"Ooh, a Sesshoumaru!" I giggled as I caught sight of the youkai lord sitting comfortably with a book. Surprisingly, he didn't kill me when I latched on to his back and started playing with his hair. He just shifted slightly and continued reading. Encouraged by my continued ability to breath, I tugged and twisted at the long, silver hair in my hands. Still, he let me live. I decided I'd try talking to him. After all, no one else would listen and Sesshoumaru was much prettier than the wall.

"How come everybody's been running away from me? They probably think that it's funny, don't t

"I do not have your answers. Perhaps you should speak to your friend about them."

"Huh? Lindsey? Why?"

"She has more control over this particular situation than one would assume." His answer was more enigmatic than I would have liked as I still had no idea what he meant. Unfortunately, I didn't get a chance for more clarification as Sesshoumaru stood up and walked away.

"Damn," I mumbled as he quickly disappeared.

"Did you decide that chasing us wasn't worth the effort?" Schuldig asked quietly behind me. I jumped and spun myself around, still sitting. I hadn't realized that he'd snuck up on me.

"Don't do that!" I cried and tried smacking him in the leg. He evaded it with little more than a step backwards and grinned. "I don't like people being behind me," I mumbled, still slightly irritated that he'd managed to slink up on me so easily.

"So what's wrong? Too tired?"  
"No," I glowered at him. "But you guys are working together so what's the point?"

"You mean you're not chasing us for your health?" Schuldig looked positively shocked. I just rolled my eyes at him. "Oh fine, I can amuse myself for a little while. But when I get bored again I expect to see you flailing behind me." He winked and turned to go. I made a point of closing my eyes as he walked away, certain that if I saw his ass I'd be persuaded to chase him again. As I heard his footsteps fade away I felt it would be safe to open my eyes once more. I scooted against the wall, contemplating what to do. I hadn't seen Lindsey in awhile but I hadn't really been actively looking for her either as I'd been preoccupied with running and not tripping. But, I decided, it was worth looking for her. Not only would she entertain me for awhile but Sesshoumaru had also suggested that I talk to her and I wasn't about to ignore advice from him.

As I stood and looked around, I realized I had no idea where I was. My merry chase had led me down several corridors and smaller rooms and I wasn't exactly sure where the main chamber was anymore. There were exits at two ends of my current room, one that Sesshoumaru had gone through and the one that Schuldig had. Deciding that Sesshoumaru was a safer bet than the German (he probably wouldn't run away and try to get me to chase him at the very least), I headed to my left and through the exit the youkai lord had left through earlier.

After a short jaunt down a narrow passage I ended up in a room almost identical to the one I had just left. The exception was that this room had three doors; the one I'd come through plus one directly across from me and another to my right. "Uh-oh," I sang under my breath, realizing that I could get very lost in this rock maze very quickly. Unable to determine in what direction the main room could possibly lie, I resorted to the all-powerful, universal art of choosing. Eenie meenie minee moe. After a moment of finger wagging and mumbling under my breath I headed off to my right.

This particular passage was longer than the last one and ended in a larger, dimly lit room. So far I hadn't been able to figure out what was lighting each of these rooms in the first place but, whatever it was, this chamber was running low on it. I also noticed that there was a great deal more moisture in the air and the entire place was significantly warmer than anywhere else I'd been. The major problem, as I saw it, was that most of the room was covered in shadows and I couldn't see another way out. I didn't want to go wandering around in the dark because I knew I would trip and break something. So I stood there, wondering what to do.

"What on earth are you doing down there?" I heard a familiar voice coming towards me through the dark. Kouga slipped through the shadows, materializing in front of me with his eyebrows raised in question.

"Oh, good, a person!" I grinned. "Schuldig and Hiei led me down all these little corridors and got me confused and then everyone disappeared and I thought I'd try to find my way back and began wandering around and . . . yeah . . . I got lost," I finished sheepishly. Kouga shook his head in minor disbelief.

"Alright, follow me and I'll show you the way back," he told me as he turned and headed into the darkness once more.

"Wait!" I cried and reached out, grabbing on to his tail before he could get too far away and I lost him to be left alone again. And so I held loosely to the furry appendage as he guided me through the room, apparently able to see something that I could not. Just as my eyes began to adjust to the dim lighting, we were winding our way through a long hallway and eventually ended up in a much brighter chamber. The coolness of the new area clung to me after the warmth of the previous room.

"So where exactly was I?" I asked, curious at the differences between it and everywhere else I had been so far.

"Hot springs," he told me as I finally noticed how damp his hair was. "It's pretty buried in the cave system, that's why I was surprised to find you there. Who'd you say led you down there?" he asked.

"Uh . . . Hiei and Schuldig. Though it was less of a leading and more of a me chasing after them situation." I ducked my head and began pulling on his tail in embarrassment.

"Hey, come on, I need that!" he pulled his tail out of my hands and scowled.

"I'm sorry!" I hadn't even realized what I was doing. Kouga waved his hand over his shoulder at me.

"Don't worry about it, just keep up." He kept walking briskly and, without the anchor of the tail, I had to make a conscious effort to keep up.

"So why is it so dark where the springs are?" I was interested seeing as every other room the wolf demon had led me through was rather well-lit.

"Privacy," he explained. "You have to go through that room to get to some of the other areas here and it's less disruptive for everyone that way."

"Oh that makes sense." I nodded eagerly, despite the fact that the wolf lord couldn't see me. I had quickened my pace and was now walking even with Kouga. Just as I was about to ask another question, I heard shouting.

"Let go!"  
"You let go, it's mine!"

"It is not!"

"What the hell's going on?!" Kouga bellowed over the noise as I finally caught sight of what was happening. Shippou and Yahiko seemed to be fighting over a few remaining cookies in a package. Though Yahiko was about twice his size Shippou was putting up a decent fight and both were bleeding slightly. At the sound of Kouga's voice they stopped and turned towards him, neither relinquishing his hold on the package.

"He's trying to steal my cookies!" Yahiko cried, ready to defend his position.

"Am not, they're mine!" Shippou shot back, emphasizing his statement with a tug on the package. This began another short round of tugging before Kouga snatched the prize away from both of them. He upturned the package, pouring every last crumb in his mouth before glaring at the two boys.

"Now they're mine," he said after swallowing quickly. "Now, I don't want to hear another word from you two about sugar, got it?" he growled. Both kids looked crestfallen about the vanishing cookies but nodded quickly before running off. They pushed each other before disappearing into the crowd of the main chamber. "Those two would fight over who had to clean the bathroom, I swear," Kouga mumbled before turning back to me. "Alright, here you go. Now try not to wander off again, I'm not going to come save you again," he grinned and winked, heading off on his own.

I looked around for a moment, looking for something to do. I slowly walked away from the doorway and in to the vast room, staying close to the wall. I heard a shout and paused mid-step, turning towards the noise as a thin knife implanted itself in the wall above my head.

"Holy crap!" I launched myself backwards and landed on my ass as Sanosuke came running up.

"Hey, you okay?" he bent down and helped me to my feet, ushering me back towards the doorway as another knife was lodged into the wall. "I shouted at you to duck, I wasn't sure if you'd be able to get out of the way though. Sorry, everybody knows to time it right when they walk through here but you're new so . . ." he grinned slightly. "Hope it didn't scare you too badly."

I smiled weakly. "Yeah, I'm okay, thanks. But what exactly is going on?" I stood on my tiptoes to see the direction the knives had been coming from.

"Hmm? Oh, that's Farfarello's knife-throwing wall." As he finished the sentence I caught sight of the knife wielding Irishman and squealed. And ran. And tackled him. I felt bad leaving Sanosuke so suddenly but it was Farfie and dammit, if he wasn't worth it nobody was. I had managed to tackle him fully and effectively and so I was quite surprised when he stood up with me handing around his neck and continued his target practice.

"How come you tried to kill me?" I asked though the pout in my voice was muffled somewhat since I had my head buried in his chest.

"I didn't. I aimed above your head." Apparently the fact that I was speaking into his pectorals didn't hinder his understanding. I sighed and let my arms slip away from his neck, landing softly on the ground. As I seated myself on the floor he situated himself next to me, changing positions to get a different angle on his knife-throwing wall. This allowed me better access to his multiple piercings and scars, a fact I was incredibly grateful for.

I began tugging on the earrings in his left ear, quite impressed with his ability to ignore me and continue working with the blades. After awhile he apparently lost interest and instead began to cut his own skin in intricate patterns with a kind of casual disinterest. I watched, fascinated, as the blood seeped over the ridges of flesh and dripped lazily down the pale arm. The stark contrast of the bright vivid red on the almost glowing white was classically beautiful. I reached out cautiously at the biggest stream of blood but Farfarello grabbed my hand.

"Don't," he told me, "you'll get it infected." He pulled a small roll of gauze from a pocket and wrapped up the cuts on his arm. I pouted as the blood disappeared but went back to pulling on his piercings and poking at his scars. After awhile he stood up and began to walk away, leaving me on the ground. I quickly got up and jumped on his back before he managed to get too far away and was surprised at how easily he adjusted his balance to compensate for me and kept walking.

"Are you planning on following me into the bathroom?" he asked quietly.

"Oh. I guess not," I sighed and slipped down off his back and watched him disappear behind yet another door. I stood there alone for a moment, wondering if I should wait when Schuldig mad good on his earlier promise and walked past me, insuring I got a good, long look at his ass before blurring into the orange streak again and running off.

"God dammit," I muttered before chasing after him again.

* * *

Kouga crouched in the darkened doorway, watching closely. He didn't sense any danger and decided that was good enough. He stalked forward quickly but silently, making sure his presence went undetected. Without warning, he attacked. 

"WHAT THE HELL?!" Lindsey screeched as Kouga landed fully on her sleeping form. She managed to kick him in the stomach and threw him off her. The resulting wrestling match knocked Aya out of the bed. This did not prove to be the wisest move as Aya picked himself up and, irritated at the sudden awakening, launched himself at Kouga. He knocked the wolf demon off the bed and on to the floor, slamming his head into the ground.

"For the love of . . ." Lindsey mumbled and ignored both of them, pulling the covers over her head in a vain attempt to muffle the noise. Kouga rolled to his back and threw Aya over his head and into the rock wall. The swordsman recovered rather quickly and tackled Kouga again, this time pushing the demon back onto the bed and onto Lindsey.

"God dammit you two, I wanted to sleep!" she whined as she wriggled her way out from under the two fighting men. "You both suck noodles, do you know that?" Mumbling under her breath she threw the blankets over both of them, temporarily trapping them together. By the time they realized what had happened they had managed to tie themselves up in a knot of sheets and comforters and Lindsey hand wandered out of the room, leaving them to their own devices.

"You're up! Help me, I can't find the doughnuts!" Vash cried and wrapped his arms around her legs. Unfortunately, this took away what little balance she had and she fell over backwards. "Oops, sorry."

"The doughnuts are in the box on the counter like they always are. And if there's none in there, someone got to them before you did." She shook him off and stood up, leaving Vash on the floor. They heard a low chuckle and turned toward it, watching as Legato popped the last few bites of a doughnut in his mouth.

"Last one, Vash the Stampede," he told them, smiling slightly at the heart-broken look on the blond man's face before wandering off, his malicious deed for the day done.

"Don't worry about it Vash, we'll get more tomorrow," Lindsey told him as he stood up, still looking as though he was about to cry.

"But I want them now," he pouted.

"Well, either learn how to make them yourself or get over it."

He shrugged as she patted his shoulder. "Okay. Hey, I know, maybe Mokuba will want to wrestle with me!" He grinned and ran off.

"What a child," she smiled slightly. Lindsey headed out into the room but, after a few steps, hurled herself backwards as a black blob threatened to run her over.

"Hi Lynz!" Megan called as she hurried forward, determined to catch the black streak that had continued on. But Lindsey was also determined and stuck her foot out, effectively tripping her friend in order to get some answers. With a short cry, Megan fell forward and landed on her face.

"Was that really necessary?!" she yelled, her face still pressed against the ground.

"Yes. Yes it was." Lindsey sat down cross-legged and waited for Megan to sit up and face her.

"Okay, fine, what do you want?"

"Who were you chasing and why? And is there a particular reason you tried to run me over?"

"Hey, you got in the way, don't even try to blame that on me!" Megan shifted around, trying to make her seat on the floor more comfortable. "And, not that it's any of your business, but at that particular point in time I was chasing after Hiei."

"At that particular point in time? Who else have you been chasing?"

"Well, Schuldig, they've both been teasing me all morning."

"That . . . explains a lot, actually. At least they've been keeping you busy."

"Yeah, no shit."

"Guess that means you haven't caught either of them yet?"

Megan's shoulders slumped forward in a slight pout. "No."

"That's okay, I have an idea. They haven't been outside for awhile, the weather's been bad, so they're sure to flock towards any opening. What I propose is that you position yourself next to the main door so that, when I open it and both of them hurry to get outside, you will be able to jump and grab at least one of them. Sound good?"

"Yeah, but what makes you think they'll take the bait?"

"Trust me, they will."

-You're wicked. You could make me look like an alter boy.-

-Oh, shut up Schu.-

-You're setting her up just so you can see her dive into the ground and still not catch me and Hiei.-

-Yeah, that's pretty much it.-

-You sadistic little bitch. I knew there was a reason I liked you.-

-So you'll do it? Please, Schuldig?-

-Of course we will, right Hiei?-

-Hn.-

"Okay, so, you wanna try?" Lindsey asked.

"Yeah, I guess it's worth a shot." Megan shrugged and stood up.

"What are we trying?" Kouga stumbled out of the bedroom, still trying to untangle one arm from the blanket. He shook his arm furiously but the blanket clung to his wrist. With a quick, sharp pull from behind, Aya tore it off the wolf lord and flung it to the ground, apparently tired of watching the demon fight with it.

"What the hell happened to you two?" Megan took in the many bleeding wounds and bruises that were already beginning to form on the two men. Now blissfully free of the impeding cover, Kouga bent down and picked Lindsey up, throwing her over his right shoulder.

"Somebody decided to detain us temporarily," Aya growled as Lindsey half-heartedly kneed the wolf holding her in the chest.

"Why is he picking her up?" Megan whispered to the redhead.

"I don't know, he just decides to be possessive sometimes," Aya shook his head and brushed his hair away from his face.

"Oof," Kouga rubbed his chest where Lindsey's knee had connected and pinched her hard on the leg.

"Hey! That actually hurt!" She reached down and pulled his tail, causing him to yelp loudly. Before he had a chance to retaliate Aya hoisted her off Kouga's shoulder and let her stand on the ground. Kouga ignored her as she darted behind Aya, trying to avoid being pinched again.

"So what are we trying?" the wolf asked again.

"Oh, right, I forgot! Come on Megan!" Lindsey grabbed the other girl's hand and the two darted through the crowd of the main room towards the door.

"Well, I don't know about you, but I think I need to see this." Kouga took off, leaving a small whirlwind next to Aya. The swordsman sighed softly and briefly closed his eyes before following Kouga at a somewhat slower pace.

Kouga rounded the corner to see Lindsey kicking at the heavy metal door. "Why won't it open?!" she growled furiously.

"Because Megan's leaning on the latch," Kouga told her.

"Oh, crap, sorry."

"You stupid wench," Lindsey laughed and waved her off the metal latch, ignoring the tongue her friend was extending in her direction. "Okay, all set?" After waiting for a nod from Megan, she threw the door back, opening the cave to the afternoon sun.

"Okay, now, give it a minute for everyone to realize it's open . . ."

"Hey, outside!" Someone cried. Two dozen men soon came stampeding through the door and, trailing close behind, came faint orange and black streaks.

"Ready?" Lindsey asked. Megan nodded and crouched down in the typical pouncing pose, waiting for a cue. As the streaks passed by there came a quick wave and Megan leaped into the doorway. For a moment, it looked as though she might actually tackle one of the men but the moment was fleeting and soon escaped entirely as both streaks sped up and darted out of the way entirely, leaving the girl with nothing but thin air to grab hold of. She landed and, for a minute, all sound ceased. Then the laughter started. It echoed loudly through the entrance, rolling over the spread eagle form of the girl in the doorway and heating her face to unimaginable temperatures. It soon became apparent, however, that only a few people were making the intense noise. Schuldig snickered loudly just outside the doorway and Hiei stood next to him, smirking. Kouga outright laughed and Aya rolled his eyes as he came upon the scene. Lindsey, on the other hand, was flat on her ass, holding her sides and crying from laughter.

"You god damned bitch, you set this up, didn't you?" Megan lifted her head and glared at her friend. The other girl was laughing too hard to respond. "You knew I wouldn't catch them but you let me try anyway, huh?" This time a slight nod answered. Lindsey's voice cracked and her laughter became silent but her body still convulsed with the humor she found in the situation. "I'm going to kill you now," Megan declared before picking herself up and launching herself at her friend. Still not together enough to defend herself, Lindsey let Megan beat her, still laughing silently. After punching a few vital organs, kicking bonier places hard enough to bruise well and tearing open a few minor holes in soft flesh, Megan got bored and left to go outside. This left a bloody, battered Lindsey on the floor with four men gathered around, staring in awe. Mostly because she was still laughing.

"Uh, are you alright?" Kouga kneeled down and felt her forehead with the back of his hand. It was more an act of showing concern for her well-being rather than a determination of what the hell was wrong with her. The silent shaking laugher finally subsided into a soft fit of giggles as she looked up at the wolf demon.

"I'm fine, why do you ask?"

"Don't you hurt? You're pretty thoroughly beaten." Kouga raised an eyebrow in question.

"Oh yeah, it hurts, but damn it was worth it. Help?" She lifted her hands and Kouga hauled her to her feet.

"Your eyes don't look right, you sure you're okay?" Kouga asked, getting a good look at her. She touched the back of her head and pulled her blood-covered fingers away.

"Oh, I bet I just have a concussion. Nothing I haven't lived through before," she shrugged. "I just have to be careful not to hit it again until my brain stops swelling." "Well, are you finished torturing your friend for the day?" Schuldig asked.

"Yeah, I suppose for now. I should go wash up," Lindsey mumbled, dabbing blood away from her nose. "You guys go play outside, I'll be there in a little bit," she told them as she tottered unsteadily back toward the cave. The four conversed among themselves for a moment. After a brief discussion, Schuldig, Hiei and Kouga headed outside and Aya followed Lindsey, slipping one arm around her waist and gripping her shoulder with the second so she could keep her balance.

"What is it? I'm okay, go outside," she shooed him away with her hand but he stayed where he was.

"No. You have terrible balance when you're not injured, I don't want to think about what could happen when you have a concussion." He nudged her forward slightly, guiding her to the bathroom, if not in one piece than at least in as many pieces as Megan had left her in.


End file.
